Before

But that was before
I paid attention to the days
But that was before
It meant anything, number four
Date, team number, a reminder
Life is a little less kinder
But that was before

12.05.10

Doubt

The doubt that you carry
Found not near me
Has only created fragments
Of who we are to be
You will question my actions
In the midst of a great loss
So I question your insecurity
Even though I see its cause
You let your heart bleed
Keep putting Band-Aids on your soul
Thinking when I stand beside you
Is when you can be whole
Fragments that weigh heavy
Taking space reserved for love
Scattered all around us
As they fall from up above
This doubt is everywhere
Now permeating you and me
The box of Band-Aids is empty
And together we are not free

10.13.10

I Can

I can go to the ocean
And watch the waves crash on the shore
But I'll never understand
Why you're not here anymore
I can see the clouds gather
Before a gentle rain
But my heart will always ache
Not having known your pain
I can listen to pretty songs
And find meaning in their words
But I'll wonder about that day
And if you wanted to be heard
I can give thanks for what I have
And watch day turn into night
But still feel sorry that you couldn't
Find your way towards the light
I can cry myself to sleep
While I miss you more each day
But I'll keep you in my heart
And it is there you'll always stay

09.04.10

Lauren Rae

Our love for you is too great
To be able to say goodbye
Wishing you were still here
Laughing by our side
The pain you felt so deeply
We now carry in our hearts
As real as the memories we shared
That unravel and come undone
For all of us near and far
No second chances to take
You in our arms
To tell you that's okay
And help you find some peace
And show you it's not far away
As you are now from us
Surrounded by His love
Gone too soon from this life
Saddened we lost tomorrows
Without you here with us
Endearments left to hold
Through all our love and sorrow
We don't know which way to fall

08.06.10

We Can

We can still recall those final days
Filling our days with things to do
Running away from what we should face

We can wish for what we had before
Make believe the pain isn’t real
Until we can’t feel anything at all anymore

We can walk this road together
Perhaps separate at the fork
And think this will be forever

We can believe in only ourselves
And think it will make us feel better
To stack yesterday upon dusty shelves

We can attempt to do inconsiderate things
And think it won’t bother the other
Or, that hurtful words won’t sting

We can choose to carry or toss
What matters in this life
We can lift up and carry our cross
We can stop living to fight this loss

07.05.10

Unwritten Rules

It’s something you sacrifice for them
What you’d do to help them along
Or do to teach them life’s lessons

It’s a game in between the games
When you decide to play along
Or decide to break the rules

It’s a fact no one will state
Where you pretend to like each other
Or pretend to even care

It’s a time they will remember
Why they arrived here even at all
Or arrived here to want to leave

It’s something you’ll keep inside
How knowing it’s better to keep quiet
Or knowing you’d lose the game

07.04.10

Crossing the Bridge

Don’t tell me how I should feel
or make me do things your own way
You’ll keep me from crossing the bridge
Refusing to listen to what I have to say

Your nights could be my days
And your days could be my nights
How you or I perceive it will depend
On the brightness of the light

Life is full of choices
And events we can’t control
So close your eyes to what you
Don’t want to see
And to the memories continue to hold

For beating me down when I’m already
On my knees
Gives you no more power to bestow
It will only break the bridge on which we stand
And we’ll both crash to the water below

6.30.10

Letting Go

The sunlight on your face
Can't brighten our
Breaking hearts
And the clouds rolling in
Bring a storm
That can't compare
To the one you have fought
Let the rain fall down
And wash away our tears
That we must say goodbye
And let Him take you Home
Where you will shine
With the sun
And brighten our homes
With your eternal presence

06.24.10

Insignificance

We awaken on this day
Blessed to see daylight
No matter what the weather
Dare you act with it in sight
You embrace the memory
Of today's anniversary
Wishing the clock stalled time
Keeping thoughts that you will carry
At the end of the last hour
Long shadows cast in the night
Swallowing the day's intentions
Diminished that they might
Mean less to the one you love
Transforming today's intent
To one you'd rather forget
With yesterday it is buried and sent
With your tears that fall silently
Harboring another lost day
Holding your fragile heart
And keeping from running away

06.23.10

Pieces of Love

Innocence under the covers
Preparing to rest his little body
Welcoming slumber slowly
Will he let me kiss him goodnight?

I wrap my warms around him
And leave him with a kiss
Hopeful my love will carry
Through a peaceful night of sleep

He tosses it on the floor
Before I can leave the room
"Take that kiss back!" he says
And it shatters at my feet

I pick up the pieces
Scattered beside his bed
While he answers with laughter
When I ask what I will do

He refuses to take the pieces
I must take them out of the room
I'm thankful he can't toss the love
Too big for him to break

03.09

Misery's Company

Your self-imposed silence will cry
Imprisonment in itself
Breaking the barriers of this lie

More lows today than one sought after high
Outweigh the bank’s wealth
And we don’t share the pie

Nobody will ask us why
You’ll continue in your stealth
To not let this moment die

But look into my eyes
I can’t fake good health
Yet another day will pass us by

Where I won’t know for my
Freedom trapped upon your shelf
Further inhibiting you and I

The limit is not the sky
Only that which you give yourself
Thinking us you can want to buy
Will clip my wings so I can’t fly

01.18.10