Pretending to Forgive

I wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt
Seeking forgiveness in my heart for
Trying to allow time to erase the foundation
Of the past and those harsh words I've heard you throw out

Truth is undeniable and we both know it was a lie
To pretend to be cordial and fake our forced smiles
In the name of common connections and the sport
Where goals and your hypocrisy you could never hide

So go ahead and lock the door and throw away the key
Having slammed the door in my face for selfish reasons
You've shown your truest colors in a fight that wasn't yours
Witnessing your childish behavior I won't hide for all to see

If you ever have the power not like the kind that breeds hatred
You might look in the mirror and someday see what I now see
The reasons for why you find yourself standing there alone
With a net that is your barrier away from which I've been led

I've brushed it off my shoulder, the dust that once was doubt
Something I know I should have done all those years ago
Still, not caring will take some time to come around again
I'll remember looking back to pretend not to care what it's about


05.05.14
©Kerri L. Stanley

We Can

We can still recall those final days
Filling our days with things to do
Running away from what we should face

We can wish for what we had before
Make believe the pain isn’t real
Until we can’t feel anything at all anymore

We can walk this road together
Perhaps separate at the fork
And think this will be forever

We can believe in only ourselves
And think it will make us feel better
To stack yesterday upon dusty shelves

We can attempt to do inconsiderate things
And think it won’t bother the other
Or, that hurtful words won’t sting

We can choose to carry or toss
What matters in this life
We can lift up and carry our cross
We can stop living to fight this loss

07.05.10